The B-word, what do a 10-year-old need to know?

The B-word

My older daughter came home the other day and asked me “What’s the B-word? I am the only one in the class know nothing about it”, needless to say she got laughed at.  A little background here, she WILL turn 10 in March 2012 (Yay for two digits!  Big milestone!!) and is the second youngest in her class, everyone else is 10 years old at this point.  Sure there are quite a few things she needs to catch up with but definitely not this one, which also got me thinking.

Why not? You ask. 

Well, my girls do have a list of words – the ones they know not appropriate to say in public; and if you haven’t noticed, we speak Mandarin at home so there’s little chance we’ll use any of those words.  Also, we say shoot instead of the other word, and only once had I dropped F-bomb because this dangerous drivers almost got us killed,

What’s the harm? You argue.

Yes, I understand and fully accept kids today are much more exposed to the world than we were, and they are going to learn and talk those words anyway, sooner or later; this is one thing I am not in the rush for.  I do believe we parents are still the biggest influencers to kids at this age, it’s also a good reminder for us, or for me personally; that the more we say it the more likely it’ll become second nature without realizing it, what’s the plus side of that, really?

My response to this curious, confused 9-year-old is “If it’s a good word your friend will tell you about it, and if not then you probably don’t need to know”.

Sure, you have sympathy for my poor girls, and I may have not prepared them well for the real world; quite possibly I am blindfolded in this issue, or being a b*tch or a b*stard, but what could I have done differently or what would you do if the world they is full of these sh*t?

A little help here please ??

What I Really Want When I am 45?

It’s my birthday today, and OMG! I am turning 45!! Normally I won’t make it a big deal nor we celebrate with big feast (is the husband reading??), but half way into my life journey — yes I plan to live to 90 years old so I can see and be entertained by my grandchildren, what do I want for this special day?

Funny enough that sometime last week I got call from a company interested in my background and experience, asked if I would consider to role that has potential to grow, and well, you know those rosy things they tell you before bringing you on board.  It would be great if this happened years ago when I was really looking for jobs, I wrote it here and here; unfortunately the commute plus long hours in the office (minimum required 7am~7pm) plus the “being told what to do” for about $75K turned me off.  There is no way I am willing to trade half of my time just to fit into other people’s schedule, not even for money.

So what do I want? A title may.  Look at friends my age, Managing Director, Partner, or Chief Strategist, all sorts make me feel good.  Well, come to think about it, I do have some of these glamorous titles;

CEO = Control Education Office

I am responsible for my girls’ education, both academically and socially.  I need to know what they learn in regular day school, in Chinese school, in various sports and activities, without over scheduling or write them off because they are not performing well, or not showing talents.  I need to know the causes lead to results to worry less.

CFO = Control Feedings Officer

I am responsible for everything my family eat, I may not go out of my way to buy all organic but I am definitely conscious and pay close attention to what I buy (and hubby cooks) to put on the table.  To keep on top of being healthy, I need to know the nutrients and nutrition well to worry less. 

CMO = Control Media Officer

I am responsible for my girls’ media encounter experiences, including TV shows, movies and internet.  They only watch the shows I approved and my ears are always up for what’s been said in the conversation, I absolutely go to movies with them so we can discuss afterwards, I setup Gmail accounts AND the passwords for them so I can lurk when I sensed odd situations.  When it comes to internet gaming/surfing, we are VERY clear that (1) don’t give out parents email addresses unless you have permissions, (2) no downloading unless one of parents agrees, (3) never ever chat with people you don’t know in real life online, unless ahem, you are on social media.  Some of these rules may seem stringent and certainly will change when the girls get older, but for now I need to get it in their heads early to worry less. 

Yes, I am a Control-Freak, and not ashamed to admit it; I don’t thing there’s anything wrong if all I want to have control is for my family’s well being and protect them in this society.  Without my family, I am nothing.

You think I have it?  Do I have it all?  While I am working on it, I am also buying some cool stuff from Roots Canada, because it’s 25% off + free shipping and the cyber-weekend sale ends on my birthday. :)

ps–I am not affiliated with Roots Canada (although I wish!), they simply have good stuff!!

 

Today I Only Cared About Myself

Runner Needs Goal Setting

There are few people I care dearly about in life; my best friends I’ve known over the years, my family and of course, my girls.  The priority usually goes reverse of that order, my girls always comes first (no, husband doesn’t even come close).  In fact, the main purpose of having my own business is to have the flexibility to be around when they need me for whatever reasons.

But today, I failed on that purpose because I was selfish enough to think just myself.  Some of you know recently I have started running, the reason being as I realized as I get older how quickly my health can go downhill if not excise regularly.  I am now following this #10kmIn10weeks program, slowly trying to get active and fit in life and for the record; I do feel very good mentally and physically, after each run.

Today is also the last day of hip hop dance; parents are welcomed to stay in watch and take pictures/videos of what the kids have learned.  The girls didn’t tell me in advance, and it’s the day I plan to run on free time (well, while they are in dance for 60 minutes), they begged me to stay but I denied because I know I will be much happier if I go for a run as planned and perhaps reach another milestone, and I did.  After the run, I arrived for the last 10 minutes to watch them; I could see their faces lit up because it’s a nice surprise and I got to see how brilliant they are.

Small things I have learned from this:

It is important to set goal – When I first start running, I had no goal to achieve, plan to follow, I was running with the flow, that is however I feel that day is how much I will run.  Sometimes I was stopped by neighbours who wanted to chat or interested to find out what was I working on, sometimes the girls would stop me at the park to give them a lift on money bar, not anymore.  Thanks to athletic hubby who found the program that’s easy for me to follow (he knows me well to know this will work), and in full support of getting all the running gears for me (the kick butt push works too).

It is crucial to follow through — After fooling around for two weeks, I am now in Week 2 of Day 3, you can help kick my butt by following #10kmIn10weeks on Twitter.  And guess what? I am away for the summer, I really need serious kicking happening :)

It is necessary to put yourself first (sometimes) – As much as I’d like to offer help or fulfill mom’s never ending obligations, I know I will do it better if I am satisfying, content and happy with myself.  Didn’t they say it on the airplane during emergency situation, put the oxygen mask on yourself first?

Do you run? What have you learned during the process? Please share your story with me, I would love to hear.

 

A Job I Didn’t Apply For

You may have seen this, someone sent it to me as I told her I needed to pick up the girls from school when she wanted a good chat, this is just too funny.

Would you still want the job if you knew all about this?  For those of you who know me, I definitely would !!  Shocking ?? I know !!!

PARENT – Job Description

This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way,
I don’t know if any of us would have done it!!!!

POSITION :
Mum, Mummy, Mama, Ma, Mom
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop

JOB DESCRIPTION :

Long term, team players needed, for challenging,
permanent work in an
often chaotic environment.
Candidates must possess excellent communication
and organizational skills and be willing to work
variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends
and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.
Some overnight travel required, including trips to
primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities!
Travel expenses not reimbursed.
Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES :

The rest of your life.
Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily,
until someone needs $5.
Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.
Also, must possess the physical stamina of a
pack mule
and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat
in case, this time, the screams from
the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges,
such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets
and stuck zippers.
Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and
coordinate production of multiple homework projects.
Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings
for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
Must be a willing to be indispensable one minute,
an embarrassment the next.
Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a
half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.
Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
Must assume final, complete accountability for
the quality of the end product.
Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and
janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION :

None.
Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills,
so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE :

None required unfortunately.
On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION :

Get this!   You pay them!
Offering frequent raises and bonuses.
A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because
of the assumption that college will help them
become financially independent.
When you die, you give them whatever is left.
The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that
you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS :

While no health or dental insurance, no pension,
no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and
no stock options are offered;
this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth, unconditional love,
and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.


** AND A FOOTNOTE ‘THERE IS NO RETIREMENT  –  EVER!!!